Blogging the Nile | Bored, "Ethiopian Airline SUCKS," and "Webb-buh-buh"

NAIROBI, KENYA – Finally! Home!

Three Observations:

1. Nothing to do… Due to some unforeseen circumstances, my trip, which was to end on the 31^st, was bumped up to me leaving on the 26^th. However, Ethiopian Airlines sucks (more on this later), and once I’d made plans to leave the 26^th, my flight got changed again to me leaving on the 29^th. The point is that when I was taking the Luxor train up to Cairo, I had no idea that my flight had been FUBAR’d to a later date. I skipped the chance to go to Aswan to see the great Abu Simbel so I’d be back to Cairo in enough time to make it to the airport. But, alas, BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!

So when I returned back to Cairo, I had a few days to kill, to say the least. Pretty much the only cool thing I did was go back to the Egyptian Museum. My first time there, Lauran had kind of rushed me around, and our trip to the museum that Lonely Planet: Egypt said would last between 3 and 5 hours ended up being more like 2. So going back a second time was totally worth it. All the stuff I hadn’t really had a chance to see was now front and center with me. Not only that, but some artifacts in the museum hailed from Karnak, Thebes, or Luxor. Now, all of a sudden, I knew where those places were. Wicked…

Otherwise, there really wasn’t a lot for me to do around Cairo. I considered taking a day-trip to Saqqara, the oldest pyramids in ancient Egypt, but backed out because of the money. I screwed around in Khan el-Khalili, getting some extra shopping done, spent more time at internet cafes, and had tons more koshari.

But for the most part, I was pretty bored in Cairo those last couple of days. That’s why Fishawy’s Coffeehouse did me some good towards the end there. I sat at a small table in the busy open restaurant, reading The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and listening to iGor, all while enjoying my tea and the smell of sheesha around me. So cool.

2. Ethiopian Airlines SUCKS. As I said, because of a situation, I had to shorten my trip by a few days. While it sucked, I figured I’d gotten the big things I needed to done, so I could safely go back without much delay. But late one afternoon, when I was just returning to the apartment, I was greeted with a phone call – my flight had been snipped. For some reason, it wouldn’t be coming in the day I needed it to after all, and my flight was kicked back a couple more days. Again, this sucked because I’d already made plans to come back. Had I known I had some extra time to spare, I would have taken a quick trip to Aswan to explore the sights down there. Now? Not so much.

It got much better when I reached the airport just to find my flight was delayed another 2 hours. Whoop-de-doo, can you guys by chance to anything when you tell people you’re gonna? STUPID. It didn’t end up being a big deal, since I was about to be harassed by two Egyptian immigration officials (more to come) and once I got to Addis Ababa, I’d be going straight to a hotel without TV, internet, or air conditioning, but it’s the principle.

The final straw came the next day, on my way from Ethiopia to Kenya. I walked into the airport, ran through security, and was pleasantly pleased demonly disturbed that my flight was again delayed, this time for an hour and a half. This was a little more serious today, because Elvin and Honey were to be in Nairobi at a certain time to pick me up, and I didn’t want them to have to wait for 2 hours for me to walk out. I wanted to text message Honey like I’d been over break, but my Egypt SIM card wouldn’t work in Ethiopia, as wouldn’t my Kenya card.

I’d had enough. I checked in my baggage, yelled at the desk man, and chased the hierarchy or supervisors high enogh for them to let me use a phone to call internationally to Kenya. While they insisted it wasn’t their problem, they could do nothing about it, I made it clear; it’s not my problem, and so if it’s not mine and I’m paying them to fly me somewhere, it actually was their problem. I got my phone call, but to alas, no one answered. I tried a few more times (to raise their charges) and then left, eventually giving into a $10-per-hour internet café. Blast.

I ended up making my flight on time, and we took off and landed without too many problems. (I was seated in between two strangers, I spilled my crappy lunch all over my shirt, and we had major “Lost”-like turbulence coming down.) Thankfully, I made it home safely, and not soon enough. If you ever have the choice between Ethiopian Airlines, and, oh let’s say chewing off your right arm, I trust you’ll make the right decision.

3. The birth of Webb-buh-buh. Then I had a classic moment in the immigration line leaving Egypt. Granted, this isn’t Ethiopian’s fault, but I’m going to pin it on them anyways.. This is a direct, word-for-word account of what the immigration official and I said.

Official #1: Passport please.
Webb: (Gives him the passport)
Official #1: (Glances at passport, looks up at my face to verify it matches. Looks at picture again, then looks back at me. Down one more time on the passport, then suspiciously peers at me) Webb-buh-buh… (Looks at picture again, then looks back at me. Back down, back up) Are you Egyptian?
Webb: (A little nervous) Um, no I am American.
Official #1: (Inquisitively) Are you sure you’re not Egyptian?
Webb: (A little irritated) I have an American passport.
Official #1: (Looks at picture again, then looks back at me.) Is your father Egyptian?
Webb: (frustrated, but cool) No, I am American. I have a United States passport.
Official #1: (Stares at me longer, looks at picture again, then looks back at me.) Are you sure you’re not Egyptian?
Webb: (ready to asplode) NO. I am American!
Official #1: (Looks at picture again, then looks back at me. Looks over to left to another official, waves him over, and says like 2 words to him in Arabic. Now quite sure he was saying “play along.”)
Official #2: (Glances at passport, looks up at my face to verify it matches. Looks at picture again, then looks back at me. Mutters something to Official #1.) Webb-buh-buh… (Looks at picture again, then looks back at me. Back down, back up) Are you Egyptian?
Webb: (Ready to punch a baby.) NO.
Official #2: (Looks at picture again, then looks back at me.) Was your father Egyptian?
Webb: (Steam leaking out of ears, face red) No. I am an American, with an American passport. Please, I need to catch my flight [that won’t leave for another 2 hours].
Official #1: (Looks at Official #2, says something in Arabc, then nods me off.) Ok, go.
Webb: (Still standing there for a few seconds) Um, can I have my passport before I leave?
Official #1: (Shocked that I remembered the single-most-important document I need in the world.) Oh yes, here it is. (Hands it to me.) Ok, go now.
Webb: (Practically running to the gate…)

Just an FYI, students and staff alike are already calling me “Webb-buh-buh”. This is how nicknames are developed. :)

Well, thank the Lord that I’m home, anyways. This trip to Egypt was fantastic, and I've got some incredible memories: riding my camel around the pyramid, eating koshari, exploring the temple of Karnak. But now, it's time for some vacation to this break!

-cw, (or in Arabic, )